26 Nov 2000 @ 12:05 PM 

Sunday –

OK, here we go. I believe I may have alluded to the fact that I’m attempting
to figure out this whole dating thing. There is something very wrong with dating
in the Naughty Aughties (Hey, somebody has to name this decade). Once upon a
time, guys got women’s phone numbers, and then failed to call the women. This
system seemed to work for years.

But, not today, oh no. With the rise of psycho stalker/rapist types, women
cling to their phone numbers more tightly than to their virginity. In exchange,
we dumb men get to wait by the phone and wonder.

Now, here are some of the excuses for being stood up I’ve heard in the relatively
short time I’ve been out and about, and my smartass responses that I wish I
had thought of at the time.

I forgot you
were coming over tonight

I just called
you 20 minutes ago.

I left your phone
number at home

So you’re just

You must have
come by while I was out

But I just talked
to you on the phone!

I didn’t see
you there

I was sitting
in one place, right next to the door, for four fucking hours

So, women of West Texas, take this as a warning. I want new excuses. I’ve heard
these, so they shouldn’t work again. At least keep me entertained if you’re
going to be a schmuck.

Posted By: Gary
Last Edit: 26 Nov 2000 @ 12:05 PM

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