04 Dec 2008 @ 6:04 PM 

President-elect Barack Obama is still under attack by the fringe far-right World Net Daily (no, I won’t link to that insane asylum), for not being born in Hawaii as he claims.  Their evidence?  Well, there’s this scanned copy of Obama’s birth certificate which looks funny.  As my coworker Tom says, his Hawaii birth certificate from the same year is pretty funny-looking too. Apparently, that’s the Hawaiian way.

The claim that the birth certificate is a forgery is backed up by no evidence of any kind, but countered by a mountain of it. For example, there’s the birth announcement in the Honolulu Advertiser. They must have been part of a conspiracy by Obama’s grandparents, who thought he might be president one day and so planted an announcement in the paper, even though Obama’s mother was then…where, exactly?

Furthermore, the birth certificate would have to have been used as prima facie evidence of citizenship at various times in Obama’s rather well-scrutinized life. The conspirators to assist Obama’s treachery would have included not only Hawaii’s records division and the aforementioned newspaper, but the Cook County Bureau of vital statistics in Illinois, the Attorney Registration & Disciplinary Commission of the Supreme Court of Illinois, the US Senate, and many other government organizations that are not all Democratic Party shills.

The latest WorldNutDaily smear involves someone who knew someone who knew Obama, who claims that the “natural-born” requirement in the Constitution is silly and should be removed. First, many people make that same point. Secondly, so fucking what? I know someone who claims that the US Government is ceding power to some shadowy Law of the Sea Treaty cabal, that doesn’t mean I’ve become a John Birch Society loon myself, I hope.

Also, for those who don’t realize, the citizenship of your parents affects your citizenship as well. Since I was born abroad to American citizens, I get to fill out extra forms every time my security clearance is up for renewal. But, I am most assuredly an American citizen. So is John McCain, born in Panama. So is Barack Obama, no matter where he was born, because his mother was a citizen. No, it doesn’t matter how OLD she was, you silly knackers.

So, we have a vast conspiracy that covers five decades and involves government and private organizations in multiple states and the federal government, all trying to get this evildoer into office.  The exact reason why all these organizations would cooperate for someone who was unknown ten years ago is never explained, but there must be a reason. The complete lack of evidence for these claims is further proof of the conspiracy, of course.

Or, the alternate hypothesis, Obama’s birth certificate is legitimate.  Occam’s Razor…hmmm.

Posted By: Gary
Last Edit: 04 Dec 2008 @ 06:11 PM

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